So… what’s the plan?
Raise your hand if you’re scared! (if I wasn’t typing, I’d have both hands in the air right now). I have been scared for the global community, anxious about my future and hesitant to write. I feared that I had nothing to say, or whatever I did have was not worth sharing. But that’s the thing about fear, once brought to the light, it often loses its power and writing is one of the few things that helps me work through fear and move into love, which is what brings me here today. (Just a heads up, there’s a mini reference list at the end of this if you wish to look into some of the things I bring up today!)
My personal life has been enriched tremendously over the last few months. Completing my dissertation, graduating from university, celebrating family, partying with friends, the list goes on. It has truly been a blessing to be able to indulge in such a lifestyle, but these personal highs were also coupled with the weights of global lows, including but not limited to: the continual fight for the freedom of Palestinian, Congolese and Sundanese people, the impact of Hurricane Bernyl across the Caribbean, and the murder of Sonya Massey. It’s an uncomfortable balancing act, to enjoy where I am in life but to also be so unsure of my future, then have that intensified by the uncertainty of the future of whole nations … but I suppose this is what we call adulthood, right?
So,what’s the plan? Recently, this question has made its way into every conversation as word of my exit from education has spread across the multiple family group chats. I don’t like to answer it, because I don’t have an answer that will give my relatives much faith in my ability to survive (we love being an artist), and to see the panic that I feel, written across their faces as they tell me “I’m sure it’ll work out”, is not the best interaction ever. I know this is commonplace for graduates, not really knowing what to do with themselves, stuck in the cycle of applying for jobs, questioning your purpose etc, but I’ve been more concerned with what the plan is for us as a people. We have all seen and heard the calls for solidarity, so how do we go on, past thoughts and prayers, beyond donation links and letters to MPs, and into consistent action for what we believe in. Some claim that Gen Z is “free-thinking”. I would argue that a fraction of us may be, but free in thought does not mean free in practice.
The youth of Kenya and Bangladesh have shown us one way of how it looks to turn your personal conviction into collective action with their protests against their governments for increasing tax rates and unethical quota systems respectively, but I understand that it may not look like that for all of us. Perhaps in a fictional parallel world to ours, a siren has been heard across the globe that says “genocide is over, all oppressed peoples are free, and the ozone layer has healed!”. We jump up and embrace one another, have a little dance and continue the good work to ensure we never reach such a state again. But in this world, where there is so much to be done, and we’re only here for a short time, we have to intentionally work for it. History has shown us time and time again that revolutions do not take place as singular acts, but through consistent pressure. That has led me to question, if I want to see this world a better place, and if I truly want to see systems of oppression dismantled, how do I live a life that reflects that? Let me be loud and clear, I do not have all of the actionable answers for myself, I’m still being speculative but I’m working on it! Okay, walk with me.
What is next for us?
I have been reading Sister Outsider (1984) by Audre Lorde. If you are unfamiliar with Lorde, she was an African-American civil rights activist, intersectional feminist and writer, she described herself as “Black, lesbian, mother, warrior, poet”. Sister Outsider is an anthology of her essays, and there are two that called out to me and inspired this blog entry: The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle The Master’s House (1979) and The Transformation of Silence into Language and Action (1977). Both of these essays are framed within the conversation around the lack of intersectionality in white feminism, Lorde was calling for the perspective of Black and queer (specifically lesbian) individuals to be included in the discussion and to be viewed as essential to the fight. I want to use Lorde’s words as a sounding board for my thoughts on the wider conversation. She wrote:
“Those of us who stand outside of the circle of this society’s definition of acceptable women; those of us who are poor, who are lesbians, who are Black, who are older - know that survival is not an academic skill. It is learning how to stand alone, unpopular and sometimes reviled, and how to make common cause with those others identified as outside the structures in order to define a world in which we can all flourish”
This slapped me around the face. I am a big thinker, and an even bigger feeler so I can happily spend plenty of time sitting in my thoughts and feelings, pondering and wondering, before I feel prompted to act. I can use the excuse of perfectionism to mask the fear I feel about acting on something. It has taken me just over three months to get round to sharing my writing again because I was mulling over the different ways I could go about this, which then just led to inaction. I think we can fall victim of over-intellectualising things, especially in the global north, where we are taught under certain western philosophical principles such as Descartes’ “I think therefore I am”, as opposed to the more communal principles of the global south, for example, South African Ubuntu’s “I am because you are”.
I remember in 2020 when police brutality was the topic of conversation, people were sharing book recommendations to better understand systematic racism. People listened and learnt. And here we are, four years later, where Sonya Massey, a woman who thought she was at the risk of home invasion, called the police and Sheriff Deputy, Sean Grayson, killed her in her home. There is a gap, a chasm, between our political/historical understanding of a system, and effective social change to dismantle said system. Lorde suggests that this is partly due to a “diversion of energies” where the oppressive force “keeps the oppressed busy with the master’s concerns”. What if the energy that went into reading about racist law enforcement instead went into defunding racist law enforcement? I know that is an easy judgement to come to as someone sitting outside of the USA, not taking part in their daily struggles, especially as there are groups that are putting in the work to defund/reform the police, it’s just food for thought. I am not discrediting the importance of education and learning, but that cannot be where it ends.
What is next for me?
As I said, I have been trying to avoid answering the titular question when it comes to my personal life. My journal and I know the life I want to live, how my ideal day is spent and the values I wish to uphold. My bank account and I know that whilst my dream lifestyle would see me spiritually and emotionally fulfilled, I would be severely lacking financially. It's tricky to navigate but if everyone else is managing it (more or less), I am trusting that I can too, right?
As for what my plan is to take part in drawing my ideal world closer, I’m committed to trying each day. I am easily overwhelmed by the state of global affairs but I also have to understand what is within my control, i.e. do I have a girls holiday lined up for this summer? No. But did I enjoy my trip to the poll station to vote in this year's general election? Yes! Money does make the world go round and capitalism makes us all hypocrites, but I try my best to watch where my money goes! I continue to boycott brands that support genocide and Israel’s occupation. There is this cool app you can use called “No Thanks” (IOS and android links here) where you can scan items you wish to buy and it’ll tell you if the brand has had their hand supporting crimes against humanity. I am doing all I can to ensure my tech doesn’t collapse on me so I don’t buy new products that are made with slave labour. I am joining book clubs and social spaces that prioritise intersectional liberation as a topic of conversation, allowing me to meet new people who share the same visions so we can work towards the world we want together. It is no secret that I love to party, so I love to know that I can attend events that are fundraising for causes that I care about. And lastly, I write. Not remaining silent is a part of my fight. I’ll bring it back to Lorde’s thoughts on the power of language as action to bring us to a close:
““In the cause of silence, each of us draws the face of her own fear - fear of contempt, of censure, or some judgement, or recognition, of challenge, of annihilation. But most of all, I think, we fear the visibility without which we cannot truly live.””
““We have been socialised to respect our fear more than our own needs for language and definition, and while we wait in silence for that real luxury of fearlessness, the weight of that silence will choke us”
I still feel as though I haven’t said much, or come to any real conclusion, but I know this is a lifelong discussion, but if you can take one thing from this, I would want to remind you that within love, there is no room for fear.
Okay, bye!
Reference list
< I’m not a news outlet, more research is advised from here lol >
You can read The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle The Master’s House (1979) for free here
You can read The Transformation of Silence into Language and Action (1977) for free here
Summary of the context behind the protests in Kenya
Protests in Bangladesh and how they have evolved
Sonya Massey, may she rest in peace
A TikTok summary of my whole chat
